Scales

ang tagal nang walang weighing scale sa bahay. i am so petrified of it that when i settled in marriage, i intended to leave that old pink scale somewhere. i would look at it then, scared of the numbers that the spinning wheel would validate. yearly visits to the doc required weighing, and i would look up while i was being weighed, and would resent the doc's assistant when she announces my weight kahit ako lang nakakarinig. phobia, denial, at kung anu-ano pa. i've been imagining na mangyari sakin yung nasa pugad baboy na, when one of them stepped onto a talking scale, it said "one at a time please..." hahahahaah

eto na. our diet requires that we weigh our meat and vegetables. inaykupowwww THAT LIMITING SCALE!!! ayaw!! pero now, on day 6 of our diet, i have come to love that food scale ;) as a matter of fact, because i've been feeling lighter, i'm planning to buy a bathroom scale and conquer my denials.

the hub and i went grocery shopping for our outreach donations today. going in sumalubong kagad sakin ang cake display at roasted chicken. i smiled :) further and up the escalator, peanuts, pizza, soft ice cream, ngiti parin ako. inside the grocery store, chips, chocolates.... ang saya saya ha. hindi kaya ako maglaway at magwala dito?

surprisingly and with God's grace, hindi ako naglaway :) there was no desire whatsoever to purchase my usual goodies or to take even a small bite. this was also the first time that we went out of the house and did not eat out, na wala kaming inuwing pagkain for the road and for watching TV later in the house. parang si apostle Paul pala, nalaglag din ang scales sa mata namin. we have come to realize that food is good, but we don't need to eat all the time the way we used to. we don't need pala food to make us happy. food is sustenance, pero hindi pala ito parang kaluluwa na dapat laging kasama ng katawan para mabuhay.

Hubby and i still feel happy whenever we eat, masarap pa rin sya magluto ng required food namin :) nililipat parin namin ang channel when the TV shows feature our trigger foods or when we know na that first surge of drool is making its way through our system.

we look forward to the day when we can eat whatever we want na and automatically control our portions. when we can eat all kinds of food and not abuse it. when we are lighter enough para we can work out and burn the small portions of all kinds of food.

when i will not look forward to attending weddings for the cake, watching TV for the chips, watching movies for the popcorn, going to funerals  for the juice and nuts, going to the grocery store for the merienda after, going to children's parties for the loot bag of candies, Varekai for the hotdog intermission, and church for the hearty lunch after.

hayyyyy mahirap mahirap! buti nalang may Diyos. thank you God, for the scales you took away when i was scared of them, returned because it would help us with our diet, and removed from my eyes when temptations faced me.